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Dear Tech Support
Anonymous
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0.
It wasn't long before I noticed that the new programme began making significant
changes to the accounting modules, which severely limited access to wardrobe,
flower and jewelery applications - all of which had operated flawlessly
under Boyfriend 5.0.
No mention was made of this in the product brochure. I have also
noticed that Husband 1.0 has uninstalled several valuable programmes, in
particular DinnerDancing 7.5, TheatreGoing 2.3,and ExoticHoliday 6.1
and has installed some new, very undesirable programmes such as
FridayNightFootball 5.0, Golf 2.4 and ClutterEverywhere 4.5. I've
also found that Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and HouseCleaning 2.6
invariably crashes the system. I've tried running Nag 5.3 to fix the
problems, but nothing seems to help.
Please advise at your earliest convenience!
Desperate.
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Dear Desperate,
This is a very common problem, caused mainly by a primary
misconception. Many people upgrade without really understanding that Boyfriend
5.0
is simply an entertainment package. Husband 1.0, on the otherhand, is an
operating system designed to run as few applications as possible, and
certainly not in any kind of multitasking role.
Further, you will find that you are unable to uninstall, delete or
purge Husband 1.0 and re-install Boyfriend 5.0, because hidden system
files simply cause Boyfriend 5.0 to crash without warning.
Can we suggest that you read the section regarding General
Partnership Faults (GPF's) within your help screen? This is a feature of Husband
1.0 and an integral part of the operating system.
To activate this feature, enter the command C:\I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME.
Sometimes this command needs to be run in conjuction with Tears 6.2.
Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Apologise
12.3 and Flowers 7.8.
We would advise against excessive use of this command line, however,
as overuse can cause serious GPFs and you may have to enter the command
C:\OKAY
I APOLOGISE before things will return to normal.
We have found that excessive use can also cause Husband 1.0 to default
to GrumpySilence 2.5 and, in extreme cases, to revert to GoneUpThePub
6.1 and Beer 7.5. Beer 7.5 is a very bad programme that causes Husband 1.0
to create Fatbelly files and SnoringLoudly wave files which are difficult to
delete.
You are advised NOT under any circumstances, to install the programme
Motherinlaw 1.0, as this application is not supported and will cause the
selective shutdown of Husband 1.0.
Finally do remember that, whilst Husband 1.0 is a great programme, it
does have limited memory, cannot learn new applications quickly, and will
often cause errors. We would recommend that you consider the purchase of
additional software to improve Husband 1.0's performance, such
as HotFood 5.3, Lingerie 3.0 the very latest Patience 10.1.
We hope this helps.
Regards,
Tech Support